Are you OK to drive?

Back in the day, this boy could party. Having just graduated from college, it was a natural progression in life. My friends and I would spend many a weekend attending sporting events, bar-hopping, and just plain partying. I remember it fondly... ah, yes, the "lost" summer of '92. Every once in a while my friends from that time period and I will reminisce and it's not unusual for the following exchange to take place:

Friend 1: Remember the Summer of 92?

Friend 2: No.

Now, it's not as if we were drunk every minute of the summer-we did manage to hold down jobs. But, it's good fun to look back at that lost summer.

Another quote born of that summer was in relation to someone being able to drive at the end of the night. That exchange goes like this:

Friend 1: (to obviously inebriated Friend 2) Are you going to be OK to drive?

Friend 2: Sure. (long, dramatic pause) When?

Let's analyze the response more closely. Friend 2 is obviously drunk yet responds "sure, I'm OK to drive" to friend 1's question. Than, after pensive pause, Friend 2 adds, "when?" to his response. Friend 2 obviously can't drive now, but perhaps several hours later or in the morning, Friend 2 will be able to drive. Let's run through it one more time, more quickly.

Friend 1: Are you going to be OK to drive?

Friend 2: Sure. When?

That's funny stuff!

Stop Sign Flatulence

You know those grooves in the pavement to warn you about an upcoming stop sign? The ones that rattle the whole car and are supposed to "wake you up" so you don't blow through the country four-way at 65 miles-per-hour?

Every time you roll over one, excuse yourself as if you just relieved yourself via gaseous expulsion. To raise the bar, veer into the oncoming lane once safely through the intersection (after stopping, of course) to relive the fun.

It goes without saying, flatulence is pretty much never not funny around here.