Needs no introduction...

Great power, great responsibility... yeah, yeah, yeah...

Well, it appears the damage we did to Bennigan's went deeper than we originally thought. Early this week, the company filed for Chapter 7 bankruptcy and appears to be done for good.

Long live the Cash Crunch Lunch!

Tragedy + Time = Humor

With great power comes great responsibility

If you've become familiar with Never Not Funny staffers via this blog, you know one thing we really like to do is eat. When the sacred lunch hour is not spent playing Texas Hold 'Em, we'll venture out with the rest of corporate America for a bite to eat.

As we're also a relatively frugal bunch, when Bennigan's started offering their $4.99 Cash Crunch Lunch, it quickly became one of our favorite establishments. Things seemed to be going so well - the limited-time promotion was extended and the Cash Crunch menu was expanded. We at Never Not Funny were living large. And then, out of nowhere, comes the email below.

It would seem that our hunger got the best of Bennigan's - we, apparently, ate them out of house and home. After tears were shed, we came to the realization that we, as consumers, are extremely powerful. And with that great power comes great responsibility. We promise to do our best not to put any other restaurants out of business.

When Never Not Funny Staffers dream...

A picture is worth a thousand words

Never Not Funny staffers see it. How about you?

Hi, my name is...

Never not Funny staffers like to eat. Visiting some of the local dining establishments often results in some interesting experiences. Now, we're not a sophisticated bunch (see the many flatulence-related posts scattered throughout the blog) so for us, a dining establishment is in the neighborhood of Applebee's, Chili's, Bennigan's, or Steak and Shake.

Even at Steak and Shake, you'll be greeted by a host or hostess and the exchange usually goes something like this:

Hi, I'm Amy. Welcome to Steak and Shake.

The hostess, Amy in this case, will then help you find a suitable table to dine at within the fine establishment. Upon being seated, Amy will say something like:

Your server will be with you in just a minute.

And Amy disappears to, presumably, seat the remaining flood of guests waiting to be seated. Just as Amy, the hostess, had stated, the server joins us within a couple of minutes.

Hi, I'm Amy. I'll be your server. What can I get you to drink?

Did you notice that both the hostess and the server were named Amy? You might be thinking, "Amy's a fairly common name - there are probably two different Amy's working." You'd be wrong. Amy the hostess and Amy the server are the same person!

Now, had this happened only once, you could chalk it up to a long day. But this has happened on at least three separate occasions with at least three different hostess/servers! Other than being Never Not Funny, what's up with that?!?!

Next time it happens, I'm going to have to say something.

You look familiar... Have we met before? Do you have a twin who works here? 'Cause, I swear, our hostess looked just like you!

The Great Cookie Debate

This Never Not Funny staffer's wife makes a mean chocolate chip cookie. I'm biased, of course, but you can ask anyone around the Never Not Funny office and they'll tell you the same story. Her cookies are legendary.

Today was one of those magical days when the aforementioned chocolate chip cookies were available. As a couple of staffers sat around eating said cookies, one's wife called and asked what was going on. I'm paraphrasing a bit, but the conversation went something like this:

Staffer's Wife: What's going on?
Never Not Funny Staffer: Just eating some cookies.
SW: Where did you get the cookies?
NNFS: T-Dub's wife baked them.
SW: Are they better than mine?
NNFS: Um... they're pretty good.
SW: I hope you get diarrhea.

Update! Said staffer called his wife back and told her he had diarrhea to make her feel better. We may not be sophisticated, but at least we're sensitive.

Pirate Greeter

A particular Never Not Funny staffer has had a life-long dream of one day becoming a pirate. This same staffer has vowed to one day be a greeter at Wal-Mart after retirement comes his way. I think I've actually found the perfect job for him:

Hey, we all have to have dreams. Thanks to the folks at Free Credit Report for a commercial that's never not funny.

Ugly has never been so hot

Never Not Funny Staffers have been known to consume copious amounts of nuts and other legumes in mass quantities and in record time. When others leave vats of nuts out for the taking at their desks', NNF staffers like, nay-feel obligated, to partake.

Our friends over at Larger Than Average will tell you about "the sickness" that afflicts a vast but undetermined percentage of the world's male population. Essentially, "the sickness" is a healthy appreciation for the female form as well as a constant awareness of anything that may seem sexual. If you've got it, you'll better understand why the Planters Peanuts commercial below is so funny.

Like the title says, ugly has never been so hot.

The older I get, the better I was

As legend goes, a former neighbor of a Never Not Funny staffer dropped a bag of shredded cheddar cheese while making a burrito. It wasn't a simple drop, oh no. In true Never Not Funny fashion, it was one of those drop-fumble-I've got it-drop again-bobble-I've got it again-bobble again-fall to the floor drops. Legend has it that this middle-aged white Anglo-Saxon protestant then stated, "A year ago, I would have caught that." Yes, the older I get, the better I was.

Fast-forward a few years and this legendary conversation where the phrase "the older I get, the better I was" was coined and we find thievery. Someone else has started making t-shirts with our slogan. Without our approval. Without even asking. Needless to say, we aren't receiving any royalty checks or anything, either.

Oh well, our loss is the world's gain. In the spirit of spreading Never Not Funny cheer, you can get your own gear at Old Guys Rule.

You're not very good at...

Our friends over at Larger Than Average have been a bit lax in updating their blog and, in true Never Not Funny fashion, have resorted to mocking themselves for material. NNF staffers stumbled across a graphic sometime back that we have adopted to be used for just about anything that requires mocking. Exhibit A:
While the Internet is the originator, it's not unusual to hear, "You suck at Texas Hold 'Em" or, "You suck at eating food." Whatever the occasion where someone has made a buffoon of themselves, that's what they suck at.

Childish and immature, no doubt, but still Never Not Funny.